Synthetic Romantic

Can it be that I've actually finished a new song for the first time in months? Yes, it seems so!

The basic idea of this song is that it has a look at alternative forms of love beyond the traditional concepts. It also borrows its name from my MySpace username. It's intended to be the sort of song which would (hopefully) be a floor filler at a goth/rock club ... all prominent bassline and pulsing synths.

As always, comments are very welcome!

Synthetic Romantic - May - July 2007

The boy with the rubber skin seeks the girl with the leather fingers
For random acts of violence and intimacy
The boy with the serpent’s kiss
Would drink your blood if
He knew it came straight from your heart and
Was going straight to his

Fetish for love
And sex under hot lights
And the dancefloor is hot enough to be the gates of Hell
I beg your forgiveness
If I lead you on
I’m just trying to feed off
The power of your soul

Chorus:
Do you think you can trust the love
Of the Synthetic Romantic?
Do you think you can ease the heart
Of the heroically tragic?
Can you take a life and fill it with kinetic
And ecstatic magic?
For deep inside this synthetic shell
The romantic is trapped in a heart shaped cell
And within the synthetic part of me
The romantic waits for the one who can set him free

The boy with the many faces seeks a girl for the masquerade ball
He looks like Casanova, Manson and Romeo
The boy who has never sinned
Would remove all his masks if
You could show him where they end and
Where his face begins

I sing of love
But only ever solo
And I want to duet on an orgasmic scream
I beg your forgiveness
If I lead you on
It seems my good intentions
Have already paved my road

Chorus:
Do you think you can trust the love
Of the Synthetic Romantic?
Do you think you can ease the heart
Of the heroically tragic?
Can you take a life and fill it with kinetic
And ecstatic magic?
For deep inside this synthetic shell
The romantic is trapped in a heart shaped cell
And within the synthetic part of me
The romantic waits for the one who can set him free

The boy who is speaking to you now lives locked in the black tower
Spiders and ravens and crows are my only friends
Can we roleplay our way to heaven?
I’ll be your poet and you can be
My whore of Babylon and let
My growing heart feed

I beg your forgiveness
If I lead you on
But if I hurt you in any way
May my darkness be washed asunder
By the rain

Chorus:
Do you think you can trust the love
Of the Synthetic Romantic?
Do you think you can ease the heart
Of the heroically tragic?
Can you take a life and fill it with kinetic
And ecstatic magic?
For deep inside this synthetic shell
The romantic is trapped in a heart shaped cell
And within the synthetic part of me
The romantic waits for the one who can set him free

Synthetic ….. Romantic
Heroically tragic
Kinetic … ecstatic …
Give me the magic
For deep inside this synthetic shell
The romantic is trapped in a heart shaped cell
And within the synthetic part of me
The romantic waits for the one who can set him free

Synthetic … romantic (repeat to fade)

Never Dance Again

This stems from a few different inspirations. It's reasonably self explanatory, so I won't go into too much detail, except to say that I have an idea for a companion song of sorts to it that I might get around to writing at some point. In terms of sound, its really my standard Pearl Jam-meets-Bon Jovi-meets-The Sisters Of Mercy-meets-Iron Maiden type of thing :p please feel free to comment

Never Dance Again - March 2007

See them all, every one
A murder of crows, they swarm
A purpose, a mission
United in a common goal

See them sway, see them shake
See the meeting, the heartbreaks
The lovers, the lusters
The loners, all under
Hypnotic control

Before me unfolds a scene of beauty
No need here for dignity
Beauty sweats, beauty sings
Beauty shouts, beauty screams
There's something of beauty in the ordinary

Chorus:
Won't you dance with me?
Won't you dance with me?
Won't you … Oh
Won't you dance with me?

Why … won't you … ?

Sometimes I dance, but that doesn't make me a dancer
Sometimes I take someone home, but that doesn't make me a romancer
Not always a vampire, but sometimes I bite
Sometimes a rebel and sometimes a knight
Sometimes a pirate, sometimes a clown
Sometimes I'm high when I'm on the comedown
After the last time, I broke my own mould
Now across my chest is emblazoned "Lost Soul"
Matches his fingers, no I'm not alone
But behind the barrier of my comfort zone
How did I misplace my day?
And why's the night not mine to claim?
And when did the transition happen?
Where is the source of this pattern?
And who are all these people here?
And just what is it that I fear?

Before me unfolds a scene of beauty
No need here for dignity
Beauty runs, beauty drinks
Beauty smudges, beauty stinks
There's something of beauty in the ordinary

Chorus:
Won't you dance with me?
Won't you dance with me?
Won't you … Oh
Won't you dance with me?

Why … Don't … We …
Dance?

And the walls … shake
And the earth … quakes
And the lights … blaze
Like the sun's … rays
And the … energy
Doesn't extend to me
And the circles core
Is what I'm aiming for
But a sudden attack
Pushes me back
Into the black
And I watch on
As it plays on
And they dance on
And you move on
And when you return
I am long gone

This is more
Than just a dance
This is the convergence
Of countless such days
Take me back to the world
Where I am the lord
Of all I survey

Chorus:
Won't you dance with me?
Won't you dance with me?
Won't you … Oh
Won't you dance with me?

When …
Shall …
We …
Dance … ?

Won't …
You …
Dance with me?

And I watch on
As it plays on
And they dance on
And you move on
And when you return
I am long gone
And I'm long gone
And I'm long gone
And I'm long gone
And when you return
I am gone

Passion, Unleashed

Long time since I've posted it seems!

This is the first song I finished in 2007. Was going through quite an angsty period at the beginning of the year, so I wrote this to remind me that the way to get through the hard points of life is with passion, that just to 'live with it' isn't enough. It's also partly inspired by a poster I've got which depicts a close up picture of a red rose, with the words "Nothing in this world has ever been accomplished without passion"

Passion, Unleashed - January - February 2007

For too long now she's sat alone
Looking in, withdrawn, curtains always drawn
Mental campfire, telling stories
Trading life for former glories
Searching for some hidden meaning
Or just a reason to keep feeling
On her fingers counts her losses
Victories for evil's forces
Dreaming that she'll find a way
To feel that she's alive again

The time has come to push the button
We're overdue to see some passion

This is release!

The clock strike's twelve, it's New Years Day
But to them it seems like nothing's changed
Live for love but the fish ain't biting
So what's their reason to keep fighting?
Broken record played in monotone
Master won't throw down a bone
Won't you take my life and make it stereo?
Colourise this grey into kaleidoscope?
Please take my life and give it hope

We've been too long without a saviour
It's up to us now to rise above failure
The time has come to push the button
We're overdue to see some passion

Chorus:
Well this time, we won't keep it bottled up inside
This time, we'll stand our ground and fight (make it right)
We've been gone so long, but we're coming back
Now to reclaim what is ours
Tonight we let our hearts and souls pour out!
This is our passion, unleashed
This is release!

Quicksand mind, save her from sinking
Have to tell her what I'm thinking
Held back by our hesitation
Self sabotage in my frustration
Third world fighter, starving, dying
Want to help him, and I'm trying
Horrors I see on my television
Propogated by our submission
Now's the time to make a decision

We've been too long without a saviour
It's up to us now to rise above failure

Bright lights start to dim and fade
With the realisation I'm just one man
Six billion of us must be saved
And alone I just don't think I can
But if we can just have some faith
Together we can make a stand
So all you heroes raise your flames
Brothers and sisters, show me your hands!

Rise up as one and sing this refrain:
This is release from our chains
(Repeat x 3)

Spoken:
If you give up now, you'll never know what could have been
And they say nothing in this world was ever accomplished without passion
So come on and sing
The whole world is waiting!

Rise up as one and sing this refrain:
This is release from our chains!

The time has come to push the button
We're overdue to see some passion

Chorus:
Well this time, we won't keep it bottled up inside
This time, we'll stand our ground and fight (make it right)
We've been gone so long, but we're coming back
Now to reclaim what is ours
Tonight we let our hearts and souls pour out!
This is our passion, unleashed
This is release!

Passion unleashed ...
This is release!

Passion unleashed ...
This is release!

The Dawn Of The Second Day

This is the final part of epic (if I do say so myself) five song cycle that makes up The Traveller Among The Lost (the previous four parts, and an explanation of sorts, are all below). This is basically a concluding part, although it leaves it a bit ambiguously, the point of it is that no story is ever over completely, even if it looks that way. It was originally called The New Beginning, but I "borrowed" the new title from the computer game The Legend Of Zelda: Majora's Mask. I'm really pleased with the story as a whole. I think I've said everything I wanted to say in it without it being too explicit as to what its about, and without it being properly resolved until the end.

This is also the last song I wrote in 2006, and it seems like the perfect place to end that year. Also, at the time of writing, the third to most recent song I've completed (although I've finally started writing again, got a new song in the works which will hopefully be done soon)

Comments are welcome, as always

The Dawn Of The Second Day - December 2006

Rebellion, the time to fight back
Is now

It can't go on like this
This evil can't exist
There is no Nemesis
It's me that's doing this

The monster is in my own mind
My Nemesis must die
Turn its eyes in a new direction
And for the first time
I see
The eagle of the south
The wolf of the north
Never came to be
And though I'm looking from afar
I see the Nemesis
And the fire
For what they really are
And what they really were
Was just me, and her

Release the eagle, and allow it to soar
Stand by the fire, but let it burn bright and free
Supress the Nemesis deep inside for ever more
A constant battle, but as for me ...

The question remains, has this story ended the same way?
Do I finish as the Lone Wolf that I was just yesterday?
Or do I end re-moulded by the passion of the flames?

But then I hear a voice whisper that my questions are in vain
I hear a voice call me by a new name

And then the truth comes to me, as though spoken by the wind
It says "This is not the ending"

"This is where it all begins"

The Nemesis Of The Lost

Bit of a break between updates there! Not that anyone probably cares mind you

Right, this is song number 4 of The Traveller Among The Lost, which is explained a few posts down. This is where the story begins to tie together a bit, although it's also possibly the most confusing and complicated bit so far! I'm quite happy with it, becuase every single word of it actually means something, but in my opinion it's not obvious at all what

The bits in italics are supposed to be spoken, in a sort of chaotic way, with pretty random instrumental noises, a bit like Pearl Jam's "Stupid Mop". The bits not in italics are sung, still probably with fairly chaotic instruments, but a bit more melodic. I think the way it'll probably work is building up from sparse at the beginning to completely all over the place by the end

Comments are always welcome

The Nemesis Of The Lost - August - December 2006

Extinguished, and screaming
We are the lost souls
We are the ones that you refuse to see
We are the children
We are the ones who cannot ever leave
We are the ones that cannot ever leave

We are the ones that cannot ever leave
Children of the damned beware
Lost souls are never guaranteed
A safe road to anywhere
And just as I started thinking that salvation may exist
I came under the gaze of the Nemesis ...

Of the Lost!
Slipping inside my mind
Of the Lost!
Demon among my thoughts
And I am lost!
Before its power
With nowhere to hide
As it plucks out all my ugliness
Amplifying it to tragedies
And running them before mine eyes

This nightmare begins and ends in darkness, a crowded theatre, a bed for two, vampires, love, and severance.
She held me once more as the world washed away.
This misty haze, this string of words, this chemical reaction, shattering to the pavement,
Fingers betray the mind betrays, ride the train again, paramour.
The air cries messages laced with confusion, the meaning obscured by the words
No time for a full return, no home, no hope,

Take me far away from here

The Nemesis of the Lost never stops

The contrast: The warmth then the endless cold dark road.
News of the concepts of life and death collide inside my heart and my head.
She whispers her despair, and from afar I hold her once again.
The rise and fall of friends, no end, first one, then two, then the terrible confession,
A forbidden planet, so beautiful the wedding, though overshadowed by the conflict of union.
The sight, the life, the pain is halved, the detachment twice, I'll never see what you've seen.
Sit with me and we'll discover the Holy Grail, sit with me, through hills and valleys,

Until it's all taken away

I hear the voice of the child of the damned
Light extinguished, and screaming
I am the lost soul
I am the one that you can never see
I am the child
I am the one that will not ever breathe

The Nemesis of the Lost never stops

A blank page, the words, a cage, a casual relationship between the murder and the screen.
My life, bisect, look foward, look back, the flowers are black but fade in time.
Nine cards, and the embers try to reignite, and sear me to my soul,
I send them far away from me, then wonder why it is that I'm so cold.

I think I may have made
A terrible mistake

The Nemesis of the Lost never stops

The slip, the hard fall, kiss the mud. A losing hand, and I've fallen from grace.
The fall gets longer with mistaken self invitation,
Forgotten mislaid messages take it to completion.
A study in insanity, a revolution, regaining control
A battle, confusion, a conclusion, temporary satisfaction,
Attempted altruism, a growing realisation, fetish, blood, and need
Attempt, rebuttal, a resolution, withdrawal,

To make you smile again

The Nemesis of the Lost never ....
Stop!

The Proverbial Fire

Song number 3 of The Traveller Among The Lost (see the previous few entries if that means nothing to you). This part was originally going to be entitled "Steel", but I changed it partly to fit in with the scheme of starting each title with "The", and also partly because the new title is a bit of a private joke.

If you've read all 3 parts that I've posted so far and have absolutely no idea how this all connects as one big story then don't worry, it's not supposed to be obvious ... more open to your own individual interpretation. It does tie together a bit more with the 4th and 5th songs though

Comments are welcomed

The Proverbial Fire - August - December 2006

What is it that I desire
As I fall into the …. ?

Last night was made of fire
Hot as hell, cool as ice
Dancing, flames rise higher and higher
Soul is burning in your eyes

Today I’ve turned to steel
Bend me, shape me as you will
Brand some meaning on my life
Give it form again tonight

From spark in time comes heat …

In your flames I’m set alight
In your flames I come alive

Flames licking at my tongue
Steel in fire, two are one

From heat in time comes warmth …

In your flames I’m set alight
In your flames I come alive
Heat melts me, changing shape
Tonight’s a furnace, I’m born again

They say “Play in the fire
And you’ll only get burned”
But I may take the heat
And be safely returned
They say “The flames will diminish
And leave you so cold”
But what if we can form something new
Change steel into gold?

What is it that I desire
As I fall into the fire?

Warmth in time turns cold …

In your flames I’m set alight
In your flames I come alive
Heat melts me, changing shape
Tonight’s a furnace, I’m born again
Goodbye to pieces past
Tonight’s a furnace, I’m recast

Extinguish
Extinguish
Extinguish

But embers never die

The Lost Souls

Song number 2 of The Traveller Among The Lost (see previous two entries for more details). This is where the story proper begins. The chorus of this is possibly the earliest thing I wrote for this project. Bits in brackets indicate backing vocals, I needed to put them in to try to keep some sort of rhyme scheme, although its a bit odd.

Comments are welcome, as usual

The Lost Souls - August - December 2006

I stepped in through the hole
That they’d made in the sky
“How kind of them” I thought
“To let me” (Inside their world)
But as I waited by the roadside
For some transport deeper in
The feeling began to subside
To be replaced by confusion

How did I get here?
And just how did here come to be?
Looking with both my eyes closed is
No way to see

Chorus:
We are the lost souls
We are the ones that you refuse to see
We are the children
We are the ones who cannot ever leave

And as I travelled
In further I felt so alone
Until I felt the presence
Of other lost … (other lost souls)
Drifting with no meaning
And nowhere that they belonged
Trying to make it alright
But always getting it … (getting it wrong)

Chorus:
We are the lost souls
We are the ones that you refuse to see
We are the children
We are the ones who cannot ever leave
Where is the eagle?
Where is the one who flew me to this place?
Where is the lone wolf?
Where is the one that used to wear my face?

All of the lost were
Searching for a way to escape
I thought that together we
Could find a better … (a better way)
So I travelled with others
But only ever one at a time
And they’d soon disappear
And leave me to find … (my own path through the night)

How did I get here?
And just how did here come to be?
Open my eyes for the first time
And finally I see

Chorus:
We are the lost souls
We are the ones that you refuse to see
We are the children
We are the ones who cannot ever leave
Where is the eagle?
Where is the one who flew me to this place?
Where is the lone wolf?
Where is the one that used to wear my face?

Awake from the illusion and I can see
The truth of the fate that is staring at me
No one exists to hear my calling
Into what I thought I’d stepped I’m really falling

The Lone Wolf

Song number one of The Traveller Among The Lost (see previous entry for an explanation) is The Lone Wolf. It's basically just a short introductory piece to the story, setting the scene and introducing a couple of the 'characters'. It's probably piano driven. The idea is that it starts off pretty low key, starts building up on the line "I am running wild", building to a musical crescendo for the line "I begin the chase", before dropping back to the lower register for the end.

Comments welcome

The Lone Wolf - August - November 2006

I cannot let this happen
So soon after the end
The eagle of the south
The wolf of the north
It won't begin like this again

I have been a caged pet
But now I've been led astray
I am running wild
And free now
Hunting for my prey
The bloodscent hits my tastebuds
The victim can't be far away
And when it starts to run
For its life
I begin the chase

But it escapes ...

And though I want to believe next time may be different
My instincts tell me that's the way it will always be
They say "Man, you know that what you are is a lone wolf"
And I guess maybe that's just what's right for me

Overview of end of 2006 - Lights And Darkness and The Traveller Among The Lost

The rest of 2006 was mainly taken up by a writing project I set myself, which I have literally just this second given the title of The Traveller Among The Lost. In the middle of this, I also wrote a very quick (but very very important to me) song called Lights And Darkness. Even though I'm fairly positive no one reads this (*melodramatic sigh*), I'll talk about them a little bit below ...

Lights And Darkness - November - December 2006

This was written very quickly, over the course of just a few days at the end of November and beginning of December. Even though no one reads this, I'm still not going to post it here, it's too personal and I really don't feel comfortable about posting it still. Perhaps one day. Let's just say it was something I needed to write, in response to a something incredibly hard that was happening in my life at that time. Apart from me, only one other person has ever read this.

The Traveller Among The Lost - August 2006 - January 2007

While I was on holiday in Nottingham in the summer of 2006, I came up with (well, sort of "borrowed") a couple of ideas for song title that I thought were pretty cool: Lone Wolf (which was my MySpace username at the time ... I'd picked it to attempt to prove a point to someone who told me that I need other people far too much ... which incidentally, I don't think is too much of a failing in the grand scheme of things); and Lost Souls (which was written on a t-shirt I have). I also had an idea for a song called Steel, which would basically be a metaphor for getting closer to someone, and being apprehensive as to how it might turn out.

I decided originally to connect these three songs together, and write it as a sort of a story in song form ... three different songs, but which would connect to tell a story. I'm not sure why I decided this, perhaps it's because I came up with these ideas in pretty rapid succession. However, to start with, I had no idea what the story would be or how the songs would link up, and only vague ideas about what the songs would actually contain. Then I had another idea for a title: The Nemesis of The Lost, which came about as a result of brainstorming the Lost Souls song. So now I had four parts. Finally, I began to see how it might all fit together, and decided to add a fifth and final part to conclude it, which was originally called The New Beginning. So now I had the ideas, and over the next four months I concentrated on writing these songs, although I didn't begin to get any of them finished until November.

I'll post each of them in a separate post, with maybe a little bit of extra explanation if necessary. Remember, there's an overreaching story and theme, although it's a bit confusing, and I won't tell what it is. I'm really proud of this actually ... it's rather odd, but I actually achieved the two main things I set out to do with it: write a story in the form of songs; and don't make the meaning of it too obvious, cos I think a lot of my songs are too explicit in meaning.

Hope you enjoy them (hell, I hope someone reads them!), and as always, if a reader actually exists, please feel free to comment

Closing Time

So, in February of 2006, I proposed another lyric writing contest on the Bon Jovi messageboard I post on (for the previous one, see the entry entitled Fade Into The Sun). This time, the title chosen was Closing Time (although one of my suggestions, Edge Of The World, was very close ... I really should write that song one day).

I had a bit of difficulty writing this one. Eventually, I decided to to combine the metaphor of an all day drinking session with the idea of having to say goodbye. The lyrics then became about saying goodbye at the end of the night, but with a finality, a suggestion that it is goodbye forever. I threw in a few fatalistic, and even apocalyptic references to make it vague as to whether it is two lovers sharing their last goodbye; or if the protagonist is dying, with the drinking session being a metaphor for his life; or if the world itself is dying, and the drinking session being a metaphor for it's history. I tried to leave it open ended.

And ... I won! :D Some of the comments I got from voters were: "Fantastic Imagery", "Unique Phrasings", "Non-Stereotypical take on title", "Flowing lyrics" and"Easy to relate to". I was really proud of winning this, especially think I really think some of the other entries were a lot better. So here it is, my AWARD WINNING song :) ....

Closing Time - April 2006

They say that when you're all that's left
It's a sign you've stayed too long
And all the signs suggest to me
The ending has begun
More wine!
Raise a glass to what lies ahead
More wine!
And we'll drink until we're ...

The sun is setting in distant skies
Soon it will be time

Chorus:
Though the drinks have flowed like rivers
Now the ice is melting away
Can't comprehend the flow of time
Within the drunken haze
We all fought to make it last forever
And it's only now that I'm no longer so blind
And I think it's nearly closing time
Yeah, I think it's nearly closing time
Turn out the lights
Say goodnight, and goodbye

Long has been this perfect day
Since that first good-morning kiss
We spent most of it together
And I thought we'd found our bliss
More time!
I silently beg though I know it can't be
No more time!
It won't be too long until we're all ...

The owner's fading down the lights
Soon it will be time

Chorus:
Though the drinks have flowed like rivers
Now the ice is melting away
Can't comprehend the flow of time
Within the drunken haze
We all fought to make it last forever
And it's only now that I'm no longer so blind
And I think it's nearly closing time
Yeah, I think it's nearly closing time
Turn out the lights
Say goodnight, and goodbye

And is it any wonder
On this day I spent with you
That I almost started to believe
What I knew couldn't be true?

Now it all seems so naive
Can that really have been me
Who thought it might last
For eternity?

Only one thing lasts forever
And it means nothing to me...

Chorus:
Though the drinks have flowed like rivers
Now the ice is melting away
Can't comprehend the flow of time
Within the drunken haze
We all fought to make it last forever
And it's only now that I'm no longer so blind
And I think it's nearly closing time
Yeah, I think it's nearly closing time
Turn out the lights ...

And I think it must be closing time
On all we've ever known
After we've left here tonight
We won't be going home
The horsemen fly across the sky
Come, turn out the lights
Goodnight
And goodbye

21st Century Gothic

This song is where the gothic angle to my writing began. I'd had the title (I think it may have been inspired by the TV programme Urban Gothic) and a tiny part of the chorus for ages, but I couldn't write the rest. Then I started listening to the sheer gothic awesomeness that is The Sisters Of Mercy, and everything fell into place reasonably quickly from there. This song is hugely influenced by them, and especially their most famous song This Corrosion. This is where my idea for a musical genre came together: gothic production and atmosphere (lots of keyboards, sound effects, choirs, minor keys etc.), combined with the power of grunge or alternative music, and the sheer abandon of hard rock or metal.

What I decided to do was take a song about what life is like in the 21st Century, and shroud it in gothic and mythological imagery. So you get references to Roman Gods, vampires, architecture, monsters, demon spawn, the Garden of Eden, and spiritualism (the idea of a spiritual stream may have been somwhat, erm, borrowed, from the computer game Final Fantasy VII). Although it seems to be quite a grim world view, I also wanted to put some hope into it, which explains a reference to the maxim "Love and music will save us all"; although in this context, it's more "love and music are all we have".

I also felt like putting some Latin in it, to keep with the theme of the collision of two different time periods. However, I don't speak any Latin, so I got my translations from an online translator, which means I don't know how accurate they are. I'll put the translations at the end, in red.

This is probably the song that defines my current writing style, so obviously I'm pretty damn pleased with it. Any comments are welcome.

21st Century Gothic - July - August 2006

Never before
Has it seemed more
Like the human heart is just
A fist covered in blood
To speak from the heart
Means to open your veins
And die for attention
In a crimson tinged flood
There is a house
That is painted white
To disguise its blackened core
We've created a monster
And we watch
As it sends its spawn to war
We don't care if the savages die
We give the vampires of today
A mandate to suck our lifeblood dry

We are your children
Stranded in Eden after the fall
Won't you save us, can't you hear us
When we call?

Chorus:
(Hey)
Shadow shroud across the sky
(Hey)
Greed growing like a disease
(Hey)
Love looks into my eyes
And laughs at what it sees
(Hey)
Mars marauding, Aries annihilating
And i'm too selfish
To think of anyone but me
(Hey)
I have to sing my pain
To keep from going insane
(Hey)
Welcome to the 21st century!

I wither away
As my body decays
It's just my mind
That still retains control
And it reaches out
To flow through the stream
That connect the world's
Few remaining believing souls
We are paralysed
Victims of the night
Corpses animated by
Just two energies
Love
And music run through our veins
and unite us against
A common enemy

We are your children
Stranded in Eden after the fall
Won't you save us, can't you hear us
When we call?

Chorus:
(Hey)
Shadow shroud across the sky
(Hey)
Greed growing like a disease
(Hey)
Love looks into my eyes
And laughs at what it sees
(Hey)
Mars marauding, Aries annihilating
And i'm too selfish
To think of anyone but me
(Hey)
I have to sing my pain
To keep from going insane
(Hey)
Welcome to the 21st century!

Tantum is lacuna servo nos iam
(These words)
Tantum is lacuna servo nos iam

We dance through our music
We are just our music
We scream through our music
We bleed through our music
We call through our music
We're bound through our music
We live through our music
We're one through our music

(Shouted/screamed) Nos es unus!

Chorus:
(Hey)
Shadow shroud across the sky
(Hey)
Greed growing like a disease
(Hey)
Love looks into my eyes
And laughs at what it sees
(Hey)
Mars marauding, Aries annihilating
And i'm too selfish
To think of anyone but me
(Hey)
I have to sing my pain
To keep from going insane
(Hey)
Welcome to the 21st century!
Welcome to the 21st century!
Welcome ....

(Whispered) Nos es unus, Nos es unus, Nos es unus...(Repeat to fade)




Latin translations:

Tantum is lacuna servo nos iam = Only these words can save us now

Nos es unus = We are one

Unbroken

I'd had the chorus to this kicking around for ages, but no verses to put it with. Then I started writing a seperate song called Unbroken, and I decided to give it this chorus. It was actually fun writing this, it looks like a tortured piece of post-grunge, but in reality its not much more than a nonsense poem disguised to look like that. Although that said, it does include some things that were going on in my life at the time (mostly my lovelife, as usual), but I exagerrated the hell of them, threw in some culture references (everything from the crucifixion to The Simpsons to Humpty Dumpty to mummification to Grease to Law), and a lot of bitter sounding humour, and this is the result. It's nothing too amazing, but its pretty fun I reckon. Comments as always are welcome.

Unbroken - March - May 2006

You can hold my face underwater until my mind starts to shut down
Nail me to a cross and make me wear a thorny crown
Hold me dead to rights for all the pain that I have caused
Saw me right in half to the sound of canned applause
You can hang me out to dry with the line around my throat
Skin me alive and then wear me as a coat
You can hold me scold me take me hate me
Do just what you will
You can rip me whip me beat me eat me
Until youve had your fill

Pre-chorus:
Come dish out what you cant take
Im in my haven, these walls wont break
I will be here, unbroken

Chorus:
Dont hold me down just hold me
Dont hold me down just hold me
Dont hold me down just hold me
DONT HOLD ME DOWN JUST FUCKING HOLD ME!

Promise me your heart only to give it to my best friend
Promise to be reckless when I know thats not what you intend
Press against me close to make me think I stand a chance
Say the Tango De La Muerte is the only way we'll dance
Push me off a wall and then not call all the Kings men
Pull my heart out through my nose and then do it all again
Shower me with kisses made of steel tipped clarity
Tell me that I never meant to you as you to me
You can cut me you can fuck me
But I wish that youd just love me!

Pre-chorus:
Spread your message full of pain
My love for you will still remain
Always and forever, unbroken

Chorus:
Dont hold me down just hold me
Dont hold me down just hold me
Dont hold me down just hold me
DONT HOLD ME DOWN JUST FUCKING HOLD ME!

I know what you want and
You know what I need
So come on please feed me
Everything you are
I need it
Im sleeping
You know what Im dreaming
You're scheming
Im screaming!
Your name from afar
And I cant be your man
If you dont know who I am
But if you do then tell me
Cos I want to say
Goodbye to who I was
And so long, and get lost
Then be introduced to
Who I am today

Pre-chorus:
I am safe inside my mind
And if youre in then we can find
A way to stay, unbroken

Chorus:
Dont hold me down just hold me
Dont hold me down just hold me
Dont hold me down just hold me
DONT HOLD ME DOWN JUST FUCKING HOLD ME!
JUST FUCKING HOLD ME!
JUST FUCKING HOLD ME!
Just hold me!
Just hold me! Just hold me! Just hold me! Just hold me!
Just hold me! Just hold me!
Hold me!

The Untimely Demise Of Rock N' Roll

I think that I came up with the title for this, and one line from it, sometime towards the end of 2005. I just thought it'd be awesome to have a song with this title as the first track on an album, with a chorus that goes "Rock N' Roll is dead, long live Rock N' Roll!". By 2006, it had metamorphosed into a bit of a rant about how people treat musicians as if they're gods, and how the musicians are only too happy to take advantage of this. It's based on something that was getting to me at the beginning of the year, but I won't go into it

Like the last song, Schizophrene, its kind of bitter, but mostly just very tongue in cheek and sarcastic. Again it got very positive reviews, I'm now thinking that this style of writing kind of suits me! I quite like this one, if I do say so myself, it's quite witty :D

There's two lines in the bridge which I came up with alternative lines for, but I can't decide which I like better. I've marked that bit in red.

As always, comments are welcome

The Untimely Demise of Rock N' Roll - 2005 - February 2006

I heard he only sings
To keep from screaming
But to me it's the sound of pointless dreaming
What was once in pursuit
Of a place in the stars
Now needs sex and drugs for R'n'R

The song remains the same?
Well then it's time for a change!

Pre Chorus:
Down, down, down, down …
Down with the music!
Down with the music!

Chorus:
Down with the music
It's taken control
Rock N' Roll is dead …
Long live Rock N' Roll!

So sick, sadistic, parasitic
Leeching off another's music
The rock's been wrapped in gossip paper
And then it rolled away
It seems the week has a brand new flavour
Every single day!
If anybody's out there
Please come and set me free
Cos I'm trapped inside a cage of notes
And every one's off-key!
And my life's pretty comfortable
And average and mundane
So tell me, is it all a lie
When I sing about my pain?
And if this goes to Number 1
I'll laugh until I cry
Cos then I'll know I lived to see
The day that music died!

Pre Chorus:
Down, down, down, down …
Down with the music!
Down with the music!

Chorus:
Down with the music
It's taken control
Rock N' Roll is dead …
Long live Rock N' Roll!

Fuck all the groupies who whore to the band!
What have they got that all other guys don't?
Rock gods may seem cool for sex on demand (alt. line: Don't tell me that it makes me less of a man)
But who's got your back when they're slitting your throat? (alt. line: Just cos I have your back while they're slitting your throat!)
I may be a loser who can't play guitar
Don't have what it takes to be a rock star
But at least I am honest, at least I am true
At least I can promise I'll be there for you!

Chorus:
Down with the music
It's taken control
Rock N' Roll is dead …
Long live Rock N' Roll!
Rock N' Roll is dead …
Long live Rock N' Roll!
And this is my music
My heart and my soul
Rock N' Roll lives …
Fuck Rock N' Roll!
Rock N' Roll is dead …
Long live Rock N' Roll!
Rock N' Roll is dead ….

Schizophrene

The end of 2005 and beginning of 2006 was such a huge turning point in my life. To give a brief overview, I'd started at Uni, and while I had made friends and integrated myself a bit in the first term, I hadn't really met anyone or joined any social groups outside of the block I was living in (incidentally, the best friend I made that term buggered off over the Christmas holiday and never came back). To make matters worse, my girlfriend of about 22 months and I split up towards the end of the year. So 2005 ended on a bit of a downer, but I was determined that 2006 was going to be better. I was going to be positive ... wrote myself motivational signs and stuck them on the back of my door and everything :D

Although I was mostly OK at the start of 2006, at times I was still hurting pretty badly. As a result, my lyrics took a bit of a departure ... the first three songs I wrote in 2006 weren't all inspired by the same thing, but they were all exorcism of inner demons, but in a sort of exaggerated, tongue in cheek, darkly humorous way, sort of like some songs by Guns N' Roses or Nirvana ... the thing I like about Nirvana especially is the humour in Cobain's lyrics, which I think is often overlooked. You read the lyrics to something like You Know You're Right with its "things have never been so swell / and I have never felt this well" refrain, and its great, just dripping with sarcasm.

This particular song was put together really quickly, took about half an hour in all, most of which was when I was in the shower. Strangely, when I posted it online, people seemed to really like it, saying it seemed really genuine and sincere. One guy even asked if I minded him putting some music to it. The main thing I like about it is that I managed to get some made up words in there :p Feel free to comment

Schizophrene - January 2006

You tell me one day
I’ll be OK
Well honeybitch, it ain’t today!
Fuck you!
I really want to
What am I supposed to do?

Chorus 1:
I love you!
I hate you!
I lust for you…
Repulsed by you!

I think I’m going insane!
Becoming a Schizophrene!
I think I’d better get away
Before you become my Queen!

I often want
To come inside
Just to rip out all the lies
That you left
Inside my head
But I would never wish you dead ...

Even though you’re gone
Still you lead me on!

Chorus 2:
I love you!
I hate you!
I lust for you….
Repulsed by you!
I want you…
To go away!
Please just leave me!
Please stay
Tell me who the hell
You’re supposed to be?
You’re a friend to me…
My worst enemy!

I don’t know how I got here!
I don’t know how to leave!
You sold me your elixir
But I think I was deceived!

Chorus 3:
I love you!
I hate you!
I lust for you….
Repulsed by you!
I want you…
To go away!
Please just leave me!
Please stay
Tell me who the hell
You’re supposed to be?
You’re a friend to me…
My worst enemy!
I created you
You created me
Is this really
What you wanted to see?

I think I’m going insane!
Becoming a Schizophrene!
I think I’d better get away
Goodbye to you my Queen!

Fade Into The Sun 2005

Yeah, I know I'd already written a song called Fade Into The Sun (for a lyric writing contest, see entry down there somewhere), but I wasn't too keen on that song, and did really like the title, so I decided to re-use it. I wrote this a few days after I started University, and I think it's pretty self explanatory ... I was very lonely to start with, fortunately it got much better :) When I first posted it on the Internet, I noted that it probably has a "dramatic, bluesy hard rock" feel to it.

Incidentally, this is the last song I wrote in 2005. Kind of strange that in 2004 I wrote 12 songs (one of which I decided I didn't like, so I won't post it here until I finish it properly ... if that ever happens) and co-wrote a further 2, whereas in 2005 I only wrote 3. I dunno, maybe the end of college / beginning Uni this kept me too busy. Anyways, 2006 would see a bit of a return to form.

Comments always welcome

Fade Into The Sun - September 2005

They held forever in their hands
Together always they could stand
The march of time was not an army
Just an ambush that never began
The young believe they are a team
Never doubting where their lives would lead
So restless, yet so rooted
To a time when we
When everything was all that we believed

Too late, my brother
Too late, my love
Ripped apart from one another
A long long time ago
When we were still young

You're fading out of my sight
Slipping away through my hands
Was that the sound of your voice?
The words I can't understand
Losing the taste of your hair
Can't smell your skin on my skin
I remember everything
And nothing ... at all

Too late, my sister
Too late, my friends
Came to visit but I must have missed ya
Can't accept that
I can see our end

Chorus:
One by one we're dragged away
The better parts of me long gone
I don't know why, or how
Please don't leave me here alone
When as one
You fade into the sun

Do you still think of me?
And how our lives used to be
I'm still waiting for that call
You promised faithfully
We held forever in our hands
Too young to really understand
The march of time was not an army
Just an ambush that had already began

Too late, my saviours
Too late, my lives
Too hard, to cross this river
Not that I
I haven't tried

Chorus:
One by one we're dragged away
The better parts of me long gone
I don't know why, or how
Please don't leave me here alone
When as one
You fade into the sun

On the wind I hear a whisper
Your voice, and I know the words
"Nothing's changed, the old gang's still here"
At least that's what
I thought I heard

Open Up Your Mind

This is a bit of an odd one. The idea for it originally came about because of an argument I had with my girlfriend at the time. She's got some very strong opinions on things (very Conservative opinions I might add), and sometimes that can really annoy me ... you know, when people refuse point blank to look at something from any other viewpoint? Well yeah, anyway, so a few days later I was at work, and a couple of ideas came into my head. As soon as I went on my break, I grabbed a Wage Enquiry form ... the only bit of paper I could find ... and wrote down the ideas. I've still got this Wage Enquiry form :p It was more just a collection of different ideas with a similar theme than a full song, but I decided to try to amalgamate it into a song anyway, which is why it's a bit disjointed.

It's pretty obvious as to what it's about. Managed to slip some references in there too: The Garden of Eden, Karl Marx, rubber bullets, rubber trees (I'm not entirely sure why) and Hiroshima (the "one doomed city"). I amused myself a bit with the "BREAK" bit, the idea is that the rhyme scheme indicates that that line is going to end in something that rhymes with "wrong", and when you hear "Why can't we all just get a-", you're suppose to think that it's going to end in "along", I thought it might be cool to screw with people's expectations.

When I first wrote this it took me a while to post it anywhere. I realise that, despite the assertions in the first verse to the contrary, it is actually quite preachy, and I'm not sure how comfortable I am using a song to tell people how they should think. But I suppose that it's more just a suggestion ... and being close minded never really helped anyone anyway, so I guess this is a good piece of advice to offer.

Comments welcome

Open Up Your Mind - February - April 2005

Now this may sound judgemental
But know that I'm not here to preach
I believe in choice to each his own
When it comes down to belief
So if you choose to disregard me
Then you know that I won't mind
I'd rather you believe my truth
Than force-feed you my lies
I don't want to tell you
What is wrong and what is right
All that I ask is that you
Open up your mind
All that I want is you to
Open up your mind

Chorus:
Judge not lest ye be judged yourself
Blessed is the man who considers someone else

Open up your mind
And you will let the world inside
They say the sky's the limit
When you embrace the possibilities
But why stop there?
We can set our own limits
In times like these

Chorus:
Judge not lest ye be judged yourself
The things you do may be judged by someone else

Replace all of the bullets with rubber
That we found upon the tree
The Garden of Eden could be right under our feet
And we would still be too blinded to see
And even now we are a world at war
It seems that Marx has been proved wrong
But tell me what the hell we're fighting for
And why can't we all just get a BREAK?!

Propaganda fought and paranoia won
Authority killed our only son
The war to end all wars but one
Where one doomed city held the sun
And burned....

Chorus:
Judge not lest ye be judged yourself
Blessed is the man who considers someone else
Judge not lest ye be judged yourself
The things you do may be judged by someone else

So by all means judge me quickly
On my religion or race
But don't be surprised if
In the crowd you're feeling out of place
Cos all thoughts are important
In these apathetic times
And if your belief's unfounded
Then your faith's unjustified
Question where you need to
And try not to follow blind
If you do one thing today then
Open up your mind
Take a breath and let go as you
Open up your mind

Sixth Form Poetry

I'd been writing bits and pieces for this for ages ... I think I might have started writing it in my head while I was at work sometime in 2004. Never bothered much with finishing it though, as I wasn't too keen on it. Then, sometime at the beginning of 2005, I was just writing down some verses at random based on whatever ideas came into my head, and I hit upon a verse that I quite liked .... I then decided to make it the first verse of this song, as it seemed to fit, and finished the whole thing quite quickly after.

I'm still not that keen on it mind you. I gave it the self-mocking title of Sixth Form Poetry because thats what it reads like ... angsty poetry written by a teenager (which admittedly it was, but I like to think I can write better than that), not particularly eloquent, and certainly not something any different to what had been written by a million teens both beforehand and since. And the choruses are pretty awful. But I wrote it down because it was there, and because I hadn't finished a song for about 5 months.

Musically I'd imagine it being sort of mainstream alternative rock I guess. My plan for it would be to reverse the typical quiet-loud dynamic, by having the verses be more forceful and direct, and the choruses more drifting and dreamy sounding

Sixth Form Poetry - 2004 - Early 2005

Just once I would like to feel
The sense of completion that comes
When the mission is over and done
And I need release
And I wish I could understand
The very nature of this deciet
Please let me go

Held under
Once again
Tried to scream but water just fills my lungs
Pushed under
Afraid
Fingers slipping
Lose my grip and
The fabric comes undone...

Chorus 1:
I think today I will rise
If you can find it in your heart to let me
And if it isn't too much trouble
I think I'll declare the day mine

Emotionally charged
Now burnt out
The fuse inside my mind has blown
Wound up so
So tight I
Need a reminder to let go...

Chorus 2:
I think today will find
A new door open somewhere in this room
And if you give me your blessing
I just might be able to rise

Tentacles slip and
Fabric rips and
Power resupplied

Chorus 3:
I'm sure that today I'll rise
If you just release your grip a bit
And even if you won't, you won't stop
What's been coming all this time

Chorus 4:
Somewhere the sun is shining
Even as you hold me down
And I can feel the night turning to day
As I feel my spirit rising

Resurrection

This is undoubtedly one of my favourite songs I've ever written. I took a break from my normal themes of emotion of varying kinds, and wrote this. I think basically it just started off with a chorus, and an idea for a horror movie style song ... I love the Resident Evil computer game series, perhaps it came from that. Looking at it now, I've realised it unintentionally has a bit of a Thriller like vibe going as well. Anyway, from there it gradually grew to have some hidden messages in it; like about how people can take their lives for granted until something completely unexpected happens; or about how even though someone is dead, they're never really gone (although I realise this is a bit of an odd metaphor!); or that in death all people are the same, not sperated by morality or class or colour or even time; or that too many people die too young; or that death is not the end.

In terms of sound, it's probably fairly typical of the sort of music I'd want my band to play should such a thing ever come into existence ... gothic, grungey hard rock, a mixture of my major influences really. It's another song that I actually have a pretty decent melody for, and I really reckon it could be an anthem if played and recorded properly. The 3rd and 2nd to last line of each verse have this rapidly descending thing going on, in order to lead into the chorus

I've decided that, on the very slim offchance that I ever do manage to record and release an album, this will be the first song proper on the first album "The Angels And The Devils Are Going To War", after Between Heaven And Hell (see the entry for that below), with a massive guitar riff backed by a wall of sound kicking straight in after that song ends. It'll also be the first single ... it's definetly the song that I'd want people to know as my 'essential' song :D

Apparently, this is also the last song I finished in 2004, which is joint with 2006 as my most producitve songwriting year to date

Resurrection - September 2004

And the moon's light tore through
The cloudy sky
A million people enjoying
Just being alive
Too busy to notice the gleaming white
Of the gravestones bathed
In an ethereal light
Deep in the ground something stirs and
For all those who have forgotten
Plans unmade and lives will change
And something strange
Must inevitably happen

Chorus:
And the dead will rise
And the dead will walk the Earth once more
And the dead will rise
And the dead will hunt down the night sky
And the dead will rise

Eighteen hundred and eighty one
Young Bill was cut down in his prime
Laid to rest beside a killer
Last shot fired in nineteen sixty-nine
Both so hungry, both will rise
Both will once more feel
The cold warm kiss of life
Tonight it's time to roll the years back
And restart the blood flow to the brain
Senses attack, memories flood back
And the Earth is cracked
Open by the rain

Chorus:
And the dead will rise
And the dead will walk the Earth once more
And the dead will rise
And the dead will stalk down the night sky
And the dead will rise

How will it take you when
The night belongs to the living dead
Now the resurrection has begun
Never slept inside a coffin
Never used the soil as a bed
Never forget the dead are never gone
No the dead live on
And they'll return
Now the resurrection has begun

So much unfinished business and
So much to be set right and
So many died before their time
And now it's time
They had a second chance

Spoken (Vincent Price style):
And tonight my friends....

Chorus:
The dead will rise
And the dead will walk the Earth once more
And the dead will rise
And the dead will tear down the night sky
And the dead will rise

Spoken:
And the dead will rise
And the dead will walk the Earth once more
And the dead will rise
And the dead will tear down the night sky
And the dead will rise

Parody Of Life

I remember when I was writing this describing it to people as "a turbolaser critique of everything that is wrong with the world". Most of my previous work had been concerned with love, and it felt like time for a state-of-the-union address. I think it's got some shades of the dark sense of humour which would be part of my later work.

There's a reference in the first verse to a story that was in the news at the time, involving a mother and her son having a sexual relationship. The bit at the very end is based on food never looking the same when you buy it as it does in the adverts. Other than that, the things described are just pretty much metaphorical. I quite like the first few lines about the father eating his own children, I think that was based either on praying mantises or something similar which do something like that; or a god from some kind of mythology (I can't remember which) who did that; or perhaps a combination of both. This also includes a variation on another of my favourite lines I've written : "I caught my girl sleeping with my demons" ... which is written at the top of a page in my notebook and underlined; just one of those things that suddenly and randomly came to me.

Even though my notebook tells me I wrote this just in August 2004, I'm pretty positive I wrote the chorus quite a while before that. Might have just been one of those ideas I had kicking around but never got around to writing down. I'll try to find out the real date though ... I know no ones really interested right now, but I am for archival purposes, and hell, maybe one day someone will be interested. To anyone who might be even slightly interested in this blog, comment are welcome and encouraged.

Parody Of Life - August 2004

What is this world
Where a father eats his own children
So they don't grow up to murder him
And people accept it and go on with their lives?
Where a son and a mother can love one another
Carnally as though husband and wife?
Strange bedfellows find others falling behind
And cut them to lose the dead weight
As we fall under the shroud of a thickening cloud
In the guise of the hand of fate

Light a fire to burn Rome
In the space of just a day
And be proud that you've killed
So many along the way

Chorus:
All you people tell me
This is just how life should be
But when I look I see some kind of parody
A pale imitation of an artwork
A disease
A sick twisted joke and one
You try to sell me - Yeah

Took a walk down mainstreet
And six shots to the head
Two months later the medic brings me
Back to life just to say
"You'd be better off dead"
I see a brother wage war on his sister
For a chance to dance the pole
Turn around in time to catch a leader
Auction his immortal soul
I stand on trial before the court
What did I fucking do?
"The sentence" they say "is to conform
The crime is being you"

Chorus:
All you people tell me
This is just how life should be
But when I look I see some kind of parody
A pale imitation of an artwork
A disease
A sick twisted joke and one
You try to sell me - Yeah

Parody of life
I caught my girl the other night
She was sleeping with my demons
They just laughed and told me
That love had died
I caught the last train out to the real world
Population one
With that image burning in my eyes
Sleeping with my demons.....

Chorus:
All you people tell me
This is just how life should be
But when I look I see some kind of parody
A pale imitation of an artwork
A disease
A sick twisted joke and one
You try to sell me - Yeah

Guess I bought into it
But it's never quite how it looks in the adverts
Is it?

Warrior Queen

A song I wrote very quickly, inspired by my girlfriend at the time ... again, I think she liked it. It's a fast paced modern rock song really, possibly with some punkish overtones ... if that makes sense! There are some bits where it appears that the line is far too long to fit the rhythm, this is deliberate, and those lines are sung even faster to fit it all in. I think this is an alright song, the melody I hear to it is actually rather hooky and catchy. I think the countdown bits serve as a pretty good hook as well.

Comments are always welcome

Warrior Queen - August 2004

Born to fight
Raised to always fight to win
Blessed with the moves
Of a warrior queen
Born to a tiger with
A golden eagle in her soul
Raised by wolves on a diet of
Learning how to fly by learning how to fall

Three, two, one
Let the battle begin

Chorus:
Fight for the night it'll be alright
For tonight there's a victory
Playing a game that is one and the same
My love is a warrior queen

Rise from the ashes of glowing defeat
Ready for battle again
Once was a student and now the elite
Fighting in freedom's name
Ten, nine, eight, anticipation in the air
Seven, six, five, see the hunt on the wind
Four, three, two, the odds are stacked up against her
One, let the battle begin

Chorus:
Fight for the night it'll be alright
For tonight there's a victory
Playing a game that is one and the same
My love is a warrior queen

Ten, nine eight, for a moment she raises me
Seven, six, five, up to more than I am
Four, three, two, and now she plunges
One....... into battle again

Chorus:
Fight for the night it'll be alright
For tonight there's a victory
Playing a game that is one and the same
My love is a warrior queen
Fight for the night it'll be alright
For tonight there's a victory
Playing a game that is one and the same
My love is a warrior queen
My love is a warrior queen
My love is a warrior queen
Best I've ever seen

Three, two, one
Let the battle begin

She

I don't have a huge amount to say about this song, I'm not actually overly keen on it. I wrote it about an ex-girlfriend, but I'm not entirely sure why. I also don't really know what style of music it would be ... perhaps something Jeff Buckley-ish, similar to Grace or something. There is one bit in it that I quite like though, the bit that refers to angels and devils, I remember that I'd come up with that ages before, while I was still going out with her in fact, in one of my random spouts of paranoia, and it ended up here ... I think I may have re-used it since then actually. I wrote this really quickly, and like I said, I can't completely remember why, I think I just might have had a title and decided to write it about this girl, even though I was over her ages before that. I'll post it for the sake of continuity, but be aware that I know it's not that great.

She - August 2004

And so it came to pass
That as autumn turned to winter
The love fell off the trees
And down my cheeks a light rain started
And that I owe to she
With her mask

Who was she? Who is she?
What was she to me?

As I hung from that tree
Where I thought I wanted to stay
She cut me free
And then melted away
She
Was gone so fast

Who was she? Who is she?
What was she to me?

Was she an angel I saw
When I closed my eyes
Or was she the devil
In a friendly disguise
She
Didn't want it to last

Who was she? Who is she?
What was she to me?

I no longer need her
But when brown leaves I saw
She pulled me back from the edge
Though it seems but a dream
I thank you only once more
And let this story lay down to rest
She
Is only my past, after all

Who was she? Who is she?
What was she to me?
Who was she? Who is she?
What was she to me?
(Repeat to fade)

A Cemetery

This was written after an English Literature trip with my college to the war graves in Belgium and France, a trip I can honestly say for many reasons is among the more powerful and cherished memories of my life. Completely leaving aside that I have great memories of being with my friends and girlfriend-at-the-time on that trip, it was also an unforgettable experience seeing the rows and rows of shining white graves at each site ... I don't know if I've ever seen anything more heartbreakingly, tragically beautiful.

I started writing this before even getting home from the trip, and finished it a short while later. It's rather more a poem than a song really, but I'd imagine it could be set to music ... also there are sections of repeating backing vocals with two lines multitracked over the top of each otherwhich mark it out as being a song. I wanted to make a statement with the structure here, which is why it's a little odd: the first four line section is meant to suggest a single grave, then the next section is meant to represent the "camera" as it were panning outwards to show countless rows of graves. The next verse, with the four couplets, is supposed to suggest pairs of graves, seperate from the others, as they aren't all just in neat rows: some of them seem to be rather randomly located, and there are a number in pairs where comrades-in-arms were buried together.

There are a few references in this song too:

"Sacrificed to the fallacy that war can end war" is the inscription on the grave of a soldier named Arthur Conway Young

There's a line which refers to graves of unknown soldiers who couldn't be identified. This got me thinking, what if some people were wrongly identified, and hence buried under the wrong name? To me, that's quite a scary thought. So the next line references that.

The "ten thousand white teeth on a green hill" line is a reference to that riddle from The Hobbit: " Thirty white horses upon a red hill, Now they tramp, now they champ, now they stand still", where the answer is teeth. The rectangular white graves do look somewhat like teeth.

Comments, as always, are welcome and encouraged

A Cemetery - July - August 2004

Across a sea of green
A single white stone
Can often be seen
To float all alone

On each of the stones
A single red rose
Casts a shadow on the earth
Where those who slain
Have so long lain
And will until their rebirth
For they will rise again

Chorus:
Walking my path
Through the past
It seems the air might say
"We are those who will be set free
When we meet on Judgement Day"

Ten thousand white teeth on a green hill
What once was moving now stands still

Heroes' names are engraved on stone
While countless others remain unknown

A number lie under a different name
For in death, all wrecks look the same

A sacrifice to the fallacy that war can end war
The stand to attention forevermore

Chorus:
Walking my path
Through the past
It seems the air might say
"We are those who will be set free
When we meet on Judgement Day"

They will rise
Sacrificed to the fallacy that war can end war
They will rise
They stand to attention forevermore
They will rise

Chorus:
Walking my path
Through the past
It seems the air might say
"We are those who will be set free
When we meet on Judgement Day"

Chorus2:
Walking through their resting place
I heard the spirits say
"We are those who were released
When we fought on Judgement Day"

They will rise
Sacrificed to the fallacy that war can end war
They will rise
They stand to attention forevermore
They will rise

Spiritual

I wrote this song for my girlfriend at the time, for our 6 month anniversary ... I think she rather liked it, in fact if I remember rightly it made her a little teary. This is a love ballad but I don't think it's a typical one ... I think its good, I like the elemental theme, and in general I think it's more poetic and sophisticated than the other love songs I've written. In fact, I'd say this is my favourite of my love songs.

I've just rediscovered that when I posted it on the Internet originally, someone commented about the odd scientific metaphors, saying that "it's possibly the only rock song ever to contain the word "minerals". My very strange, slightly arrogant, and (in my opinion at least) rather fantastic reply was "Science, my friend, is the art of nature". Heh, not quite sure where I got that from!

I'd appreciate any comments, I'm beginning to feel as though I'm posting these just for myself ... if I am then that's fair enough, I'd still get a sense of accomplishment, but if anyone is reading this, it'd be nice for them to make themselves known.

Spiritual - February - July 2004

Together we two are a fuel
In which a dormant energy hides
A single spark all that’s needed
For this passion to ignite
And raise the flame that softly flickers
As though dancing in the breeze
To a music only heard by those
Who feel it in their dreams
A hypnotic glowing image is what I
See as slowly old ghosts burn
In one heated night the light of truth
Becomes aware of love’s return

In the torrent of the rapids
White waves crash upon the rocks
Wash away the noisy urgency
Of a thousand ticking clocks
Leaving a lake borne out of stillness
Like a faded memory
The waters seek to carry us
As we sail along life’s stream
And as the rain begins to fall
Into the mighty sea we’ll plunge
Diving into what it may bring
As if we two were one

Have you come to
Spirit me away?

Chorus:
While the golden fires burn
The wild waters will flow
As the rich Earth still turns
And a soothing wind blows
You remain the embodiment of my love
Because I feel that you are a spirit sent from above

I see a down-to-earth angel
With a flower in her hand
She holds the power to make hills
Rise up from out of dead sand
The old seed lives within the soil
New life lives deep in the seed
A symbiotic relationship
That fulfils all of our needs
As the plants absorb minerals
Which will let them bear fruit
Everything that you give me
Helps me break free of these roots

An element of surprise…

Entering into your world
Felt just like stepping into
A hurricane of your defences
Your own wind shield guarding you
Deep inside the maelstrom
The eye waits to feel the touch
Of the mortal man who is prepared
To stand the air’s last rush
This gale lifts us of our feet
And blows us far away from here
Like a surging gust of power
The strength of love becomes so clear

Have you come to
Spirit me away?

Chorus:
While the golden fires burn
The wild waters will flow
As the rich Earth still turns
And a soothing wind blows
You remain the embodiment of my love
Because I feel that you are a spirit sent from above

You’ve cast your compassion
In a spell around my heart

At the core of this Earth
The fire inside is beating
As the wind stings our faces
A watery tear leaves your eye
The feeling you radiate
Is what my whole world was needing
And you started to save it
The moment you fell from the sky

The element of surprise…

Chorus:
While the golden fires burn
The wild waters will flow
As the rich Earth still turns
And a soothing wind blows
You remain the embodiment of my love
Because I feel that you are a spirit sent from above

A spiritual being who has stolen my love